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family discourse

Page history last edited by PBworks 16 years, 3 months ago

Family Discourse


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For the past few years, my parents and I have steadily been growing apart from each other. Before I moved off to college, and when we all lived underneath the same roof, we normally went our separate ways throughout the day, meeting only for dinner to converse for a short time about our day only to disperse, yet again, to our separate dwellings. My parents and I would wake up in the mornings, take our showers, get dressed then head out for work and school. I departed from the house in the morning when my parents were both still asleep and returned at night, dragging in after both of them had already returned home. I drove directly to my job at a local auto mechanics shop down the road from my school after I was released from class, working until six or so. When I finally reached the house, I was only able to spare a few minutes for dinner with my parents, needing the rest of the night to read and finish my homework for the next day. I normally had weekends off from work, but was always out and about with my friends or sleeping late into the afternoon to spend quality time with my parents. Honestly, the only real time I had to see my family was during dinner each night, which my mother regularly prepared.


Because of this time, however, I have come to the realization that my true family extends beyond my parents and into my extended family, friendships and acquaintances throughout my life. Because I was unable to grow up without a sibling, I have grown very attached to my cousins and friends to fill the void. Being raised as an only child can be a pretty lonesome experience. For all of you that have siblings and take their company for granted, be fortunate that you were forced to find ways to deal with their presence, for it pays off. Having a sibling really and truly does help develop situational and personal skills to kids of a younger age that others may not otherwise be so fortunate to have. I was unlucky enough to have to learn a lot of life's lessons through my own ordeals. I could only listen to what my parents had to say and find different ways to deal with my own experiences.


I was able to persevere, however, and looked to my friends and family for guidance and acceptance. I look back at the special moments I was able to spend with my parents and close friends and appreciate those memories for what they are. Without all of them, I would not be the person I am today.


Although my adolescent years of high school felt like they would never end, my earlier years of childhood were different altogether. All of my child hood recollections involve my parents in one way or another. Especially memories of my mother. My mother would later find herself in a position where she was constantly traveling across the states for various business meetings. During my childhood, however, she would always find time to be with me. We frequently visited Canada for skiing trips, went to the parks near downtown Houston and even played tennis together regularly. I have always had a special relationship with my mother because of these times we spent together. Even my father found time to spend with me when he wasn't busy. He taught me how to play catch, how to ride a motorcycle and even how to work on cars.


All of that changed, though, soon enough. I felt as if I was finally growing up; beginning new relationships and going out with my friends more than I ever did before. My parents too took on new jobs that required traveling and generally spent more time away from home than they used to. This is about the time our bonds began to feel as if they were deteriorating. My father was spending more time in the garage or in his study and my mother was finding less time to be with us. Even I was working more. Our busy days took their toll as we were all exhausted by the time we came home. Things were looking bleak. It was at this time that I looked to my friends for support. I don't know what I would have done without having any friends at this point in my life. I looked forward to talking with all of them in class and joking around during lunch. I see all of my friends as being figurative brothers and sisters unbound by genetics. Each and every one of my close friends is part of my extended family.


This extended family of sorts has aided me through many a troubled times. It's never easy dealing with your problems, especially if you feel alone. There is nothing worse in this world than the feeling of complete isolation. Why should someone care about me, though? Aren't we supposed to keep our own well-being as the highest priority in this world? Is not our own survival the most important thing to each of our respective selves? It's quite easy to apathetically walk through life, focusing only on our own survival. Its the Darwinian way of life. Strangers do it every day. How often do you see a complete stranger walking by, stop and offer help to someone in need? Unfortunately, it doesn't happen as often as it should. Helping a friend or family member is a very compassionate act that shows you actually care for their well-being and are willing to make a sacrifice to help them out. My friends have always been there when I needed them, like when I broke my collar bone at the track. I am very fortunate to have friends like them and will always appreciate their actions. I also have my parents; my only immediate family members. They have shown some tough love in the past, but I recognize now that it was their way of letting me mess up, thus allowing me to learn from my mistakes. Sometimes, though, they preferred words. It could be something as simple as advice such as staying away from a bad apple, or rather a direct lesson of life; I took it all to heart. Time has proven again and again that their two cents are priceless. For example, one thing I was never particularly good at was claiming responsibility for my actions. This lesser trait of mine can be viewed from my run-ins with the law. My parents have never taken the fall for my mistakes. They have always let me take the comeuppance from my spells of trouble making over the years. Punishments are never easy to swallow, but you do your time like a man and get it over with. Because of my "extended family," I am what I am today. They have all been an integral part in the creation of Me sitting here today. Regardless of all the mistakes made or criticisms taken, they have all been chisels to the statue that is Me.

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